All quotes and wisdom by George Carlin. Discover best quotes and thoughts.
If the shoe fits, buy another one just like it.
Weather forecast for tonight: dark.
At a formal dinner party, the person nearest death should always be seated closest to the bathroom.
Once you leave out all the bullshit they teach you in school, life gets really simple.
Avoid teams at all cost. Keep your circle small. Never join a group that has a name.
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