Dave Barry

Dave Barry is an American author and humorist known for his satirical commentary on American life.

"Perhaps you are thinking: 'But a tank costs several million dollars, not including floor mats. I don't have that kind of money.'Don't be silly. You're a consumer, right? You have credit cards, right?Perhaps you are thinking: 'Yes, but how am I going to pay the credit-card company?'Don't be silly. You have a tank, right?"

Dave Barry

"Flying from the U.S. To Tokyo takes approximately as long as law school."

Dave Barry

"The four building blocks of the universe are fire, water, gravel and vinyl."

Dave Barry